Friday, November 07, 2008

Lessons from the Rock: Safe, or Brave?


Just before our day of rock climbing in Kentucky, I finished a couple of books that proved significant for our day. One was Wild at Heart by John Eldredge, and the other was Just Courage by Gary Haugen. As I watched Jacob attack and work his way through the two red advanced sections and then the black diamond expert section of the climb, I realized that I had read those books at just the right time.

Eldredge’s writing convinced me that our day of climbing was a needed, special day. Men need adventure. I think Eldredge would agree with Chris McCandless, who says in the movie Into the Wild that “I read somewhere . . . how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong . . . but to feel strong.” Men need to be tested. I don’t know that I’d ever really thought about that, since my life mainly consists of the same routine that most of yours does – we get up, go to work, come home, eat supper, go to bed, and repeat. Christian or not, the typical life in America is not adventurous and is more or less a merry go round of repetition. (I’m sorry if that sounds harsh. Try this – for a week or even a month, write down your daily activities, and see if you couldn’t just cut and paste your days.) I’ve told a lot of folks since we went that our day on the rock was maybe one of the top 2 or 3 days of my life, in terms of shear meaning and importance.

A huge lesson from Just Courage was found in a question that Haugen deals with brilliantly – “Do I want my children to be safe, or brave?” At about the mid-point of the black diamond section, I watched hesitantly as it became obvious that Jacob was exhausted. He told me later that he was at the end of his endurance. He was in front of Guy, so there they were, just hanging out (literally) waaaaaaaaaay up in the air, resting. As a dad, I was starting to panic. Would the mountain guides have to rescue Jacob? What if in the rescue process he had to unclip - would that increase his chances of falling? How could I have allowed him to do this? What kind of a dad am I anyway? *Pause* If you know me, you know that I obsess occasionally. Just a little bit. I’ve got all of this stuff running through my head as a stressed out dad, but then I watched as Jacob pulled himself up and got moving again!

What I didn’t know is that he and Guy shared a short conversation. After resting a bit, Guy looked at Jacob and said, “We’ve come all this way, now – let’s finish strong.” That’s when Jacob, after hearing Guy's encouragement, silently answered by pulling himself up, and then began clipping and unclipping his way around the hardest part of the climb to finish the entire Torrent Falls adventure.

When they came down, it was obvious that both of them were wiped out. Jacob simply said, “I did it. I finished strong.” Now – I am willing to bet that at some point in his life, Jacob will come up against something – a situation, a person, a job, a trial – that will try and beat him. He will remember what it feels like to finish strong. And that moment of bravery on the rock will make all the difference.

No comments: